TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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