we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Someone stole a lamp last night.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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