I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Houston, we have a blender
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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