True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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