is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize