I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize