That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
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You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
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I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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