i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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