MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
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Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
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I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
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