so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize