Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
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Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
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I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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