i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize