a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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