Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
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I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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