I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
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It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
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