I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We talked him into tasing himself.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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