I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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