Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize