I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize