My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
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See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
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I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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