yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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