you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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