Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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