Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  No...more like a life jacket.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet? (1-603): No...more like a life jacket. http://tfl.nu/4uwt
  Replies (8) Good night (1401) Bad night (475) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again. http://tfl.nu/vc1t
  Replies (24) Good night (3602) Bad night (481) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in. http://tfl.nu/9xed
  Replies (43) Good night (980) Bad night (8033) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it http://tfl.nu/d9op
  Replies (28) Good night (6029) Bad night (572) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (807): View more from Ontario

  Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (807): Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables http://tfl.nu/0ytp
  Replies (11) Good night (4960) Bad night (886) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it http://tfl.nu/9xaf
  Replies (36) Good night (6889) Bad night (1085) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (831): So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me... http://tfl.nu/3wpt
  Replies (18) Good night (1271) Bad night (6454) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around. http://tfl.nu/b39f
  Replies (10) Good night (1103) Bad night (4569) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves. http://tfl.nu/b0kq
  Replies (12) Good night (4015) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy http://tfl.nu/5ech
  Replies (17) Good night (802) Bad night (5763) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (770): How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden http://tfl.nu/1f55
  Replies (10) Good night (3753) Bad night (951) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (641): View more from Iowa

  Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (641): Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird. http://tfl.nu/ck05
  Replies (4) Good night (2003) Bad night (1439) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex. http://tfl.nu/rz6s
  Replies (12) Good night (4061) Bad night (784) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex... http://tfl.nu/wlmu
  Replies (12) Good night (2620) Bad night (387) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (309): It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change. http://tfl.nu/p0m1
  Replies (14) Good night (843) Bad night (698)

Randomize