Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
ugly people sure do ruin things
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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