can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize