hell yes lets make some ravioli
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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