I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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