So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
we're making bets on your personal life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
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