I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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