it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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