i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
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It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
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the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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