I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Who put my cat in the fridge?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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