i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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