Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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