It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
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