DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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