singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
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