we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
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