Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize